what it says on the tin.
anyone got a fun tabletop rpg story they want to share? i really enjoy hearing stories from other tables. i'll (hopefully) post one later when i have more time to type lol
edit to add i realized the title is too narrow after hitting post. any game system is cool. should be updated now
tabletop stories thread i guess
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acetylcholine
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tabletop stories thread i guess
she/they/he. professional dork. dragon on the weekends (and during the week too). ask me about d&d or music.
dragon cave stuff:
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IgneousCroc
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I haven't played Too Much Dnd, but here are two tidbits from the last times I played:
1- Rockhead, my dragonborn barbarian. He tried to throw a throwing axe (normal activity) to an enemy. Dropped the coolest one liner. Rolled a 1. The axe acted like a boomerang and hit him in the noggin.
(The blunt part, but it still knocked him cold. I'd like to thank my DM for letting me live my first ever dnd session.)
2- Skarn, my other dragonborn barbarian. After several sessions of rolling poorly and generally doing a terrible job at being a barbarian (since the very beginning!), Skarn succesfully rolls a 20 and lassoos one of the Big Evil Guys and then downs another by throwing a gobling with surgeon like precuson.
1- Rockhead, my dragonborn barbarian. He tried to throw a throwing axe (normal activity) to an enemy. Dropped the coolest one liner. Rolled a 1. The axe acted like a boomerang and hit him in the noggin.
(The blunt part, but it still knocked him cold. I'd like to thank my DM for letting me live my first ever dnd session.)
2- Skarn, my other dragonborn barbarian. After several sessions of rolling poorly and generally doing a terrible job at being a barbarian (since the very beginning!), Skarn succesfully rolls a 20 and lassoos one of the Big Evil Guys and then downs another by throwing a gobling with surgeon like precuson.
this dragon 
runs on ginger ale 
more as a GM than as a player:
an old janitor (a player character) of a floating univercity town turned out to have a fanclub of old gay men who all had crushes on him. they were instrumental in preparing for the final fight against an elder god.
in a lancer game, I had my players fend off against a hivemind of sonsic the hedgehogs (long story), and later on I had a sonsic hive queen as a boss enemy. like bees, most sonsics can only survive doing one attack (kinda gruesome but really funny) that campaign ended with the players giving therapy to a moon.
oh yeah at one point my players kept asking for backstory from a random NPC. I kept improvising until I ended up saying that he had an uncle named harold who turned himself into a chair but it didn't exactly pan out, turned into Harold the Hair Chair. later on for a halloween special I revealed that he had become a lich, Harold the Bone Chair, and had my players face him and his hordes of bone giraffes (another long story). there was a short campaign about defeating him once and for all, and he destroyed the foam museum before they managed to stop him. the foam museum.... TvT
an old janitor (a player character) of a floating univercity town turned out to have a fanclub of old gay men who all had crushes on him. they were instrumental in preparing for the final fight against an elder god.
in a lancer game, I had my players fend off against a hivemind of sonsic the hedgehogs (long story), and later on I had a sonsic hive queen as a boss enemy. like bees, most sonsics can only survive doing one attack (kinda gruesome but really funny)
► Show Spoiler
oh yeah at one point my players kept asking for backstory from a random NPC. I kept improvising until I ended up saying that he had an uncle named harold who turned himself into a chair but it didn't exactly pan out, turned into Harold the Hair Chair. later on for a halloween special I revealed that he had become a lich, Harold the Bone Chair, and had my players face him and his hordes of bone giraffes (another long story). there was a short campaign about defeating him once and for all, and he destroyed the foam museum before they managed to stop him. the foam museum.... TvT
it/its | xie/xer | pfp by crowtaur
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i have so many stories
as a dm:
-the players put liquid belief that can bring back the dead into a waterskin. it comes to life. it screams nonstop in agony until they put it down.
-one player jumps into a teeth pile in order to get teeth as a snack
-said player also harassed a being older than the universe to make a "meat thrower". like a flamethrower, but meat.
-also meat dirt. that character also wanted meat dirt. no, i don't know what that means.
-horses do not exist in that universe. they were entirely erased by one dude who really hated them. unfortunately he hated them because he was cursed to be one so when he erased the very concept of horses from reality, he too was erased.
as a player:
-gave an autognome a headband of intelligence and it screamed endlessly at the burden of sapience
-my horrible little impulsive idiot of an echo knight walked up to a grieving mother who's already missing one of her kids and said, word for word, "Your old coworker slaughtered your other kid."
-said impulsive fool also grabbed a knife that was clearly enchanted and nearly blew up the entire party, almost killing another party member
-philbert the caveman threw a boulder through a door and the party wizard told everyone inside that they needed jesus (the god of magic in that setting)
-the luckiest girl alive gets separated from the group and manages to run into a troll. she escapes and lures the troll back to the party via getting lucky with the troll failing to go through the grease spell she slapped down.
-local rat kills five people as they go up the stairs and leaves an almost literal waterfall of gore in doing so. the party death paladin is impressed.
these are a few funny stories. the serious ones take way longer to write out lmao. i have had one campaign make me cry twice (the one with the echo knight) so
as a dm:
-the players put liquid belief that can bring back the dead into a waterskin. it comes to life. it screams nonstop in agony until they put it down.
-one player jumps into a teeth pile in order to get teeth as a snack
-said player also harassed a being older than the universe to make a "meat thrower". like a flamethrower, but meat.
-also meat dirt. that character also wanted meat dirt. no, i don't know what that means.
-horses do not exist in that universe. they were entirely erased by one dude who really hated them. unfortunately he hated them because he was cursed to be one so when he erased the very concept of horses from reality, he too was erased.
as a player:
-gave an autognome a headband of intelligence and it screamed endlessly at the burden of sapience
-my horrible little impulsive idiot of an echo knight walked up to a grieving mother who's already missing one of her kids and said, word for word, "Your old coworker slaughtered your other kid."
-said impulsive fool also grabbed a knife that was clearly enchanted and nearly blew up the entire party, almost killing another party member
-philbert the caveman threw a boulder through a door and the party wizard told everyone inside that they needed jesus (the god of magic in that setting)
-the luckiest girl alive gets separated from the group and manages to run into a troll. she escapes and lures the troll back to the party via getting lucky with the troll failing to go through the grease spell she slapped down.
-local rat kills five people as they go up the stairs and leaves an almost literal waterfall of gore in doing so. the party death paladin is impressed.
these are a few funny stories. the serious ones take way longer to write out lmao. i have had one campaign make me cry twice (the one with the echo knight) so
Icon by lapouris, signature by batnoise and UnholyLykoi
host of the Ehksidian System
she/her
host of the Ehksidian System
she/her
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Ehmaree
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Classic TTRPG shenanigans/hjEhksidian wrote: ↑October 2nd, 2023, 2:52 pm i have so many stories
as a dm:
-the players put liquid belief that can bring back the dead into a waterskin. it comes to life. it screams nonstop in agony until they put it down.
-one player jumps into a teeth pile in order to get teeth as a snack
-said player also harassed a being older than the universe to make a "meat thrower". like a flamethrower, but meat.
-also meat dirt. that character also wanted meat dirt. no, i don't know what that means.
-horses do not exist in that universe. they were entirely erased by one dude who really hated them. unfortunately he hated them because he was cursed to be one so when he erased the very concept of horses from reality, he too was erased.
as a player:
-gave an autognome a headband of intelligence and it screamed endlessly at the burden of sapience
-my horrible little impulsive idiot of an echo knight walked up to a grieving mother who's already missing one of her kids and said, word for word, "Your old coworker slaughtered your other kid."
-said impulsive fool also grabbed a knife that was clearly enchanted and nearly blew up the entire party, almost killing another party member
-philbert the caveman threw a boulder through a door and the party wizard told everyone inside that they needed jesus (the god of magic in that setting)
-the luckiest girl alive gets separated from the group and manages to run into a troll. she escapes and lures the troll back to the party via getting lucky with the troll failing to go through the grease spell she slapped down.
-local rat kills five people as they go up the stairs and leaves an almost literal waterfall of gore in doing so. the party death paladin is impressed.
these are a few funny stories. the serious ones take way longer to write out lmao. i have had one campaign make me cry twice (the one with the echo knight) so
could also add some shenaningans as a player
lizardfolk musician who started having internal conversations with her bass (who personified her more violent band persona) in order to find advice. turns out that bass was haunted by moon spirits or something. she started a moon club at a local library to find out more.
same character tried to convince a devil that the material plane was a cool place to live by explaining local cheeses to her (that devil already knew what cheese was).
kobold painter-warrior who got so angry that a noble had a golden toilet that she started screaming from the top of her lungs and tore it to shreads.
elderly aarakocra healer who was banned from playing truth-or-dare in their childhood because of the chaos they caused. the party still agreed to play it with them and someone was forced to eat a lemon. they were dared to eat a lemon themself, and turns out being a bird makes that a lot easier.
I have a long streak of nearly exclusively playing reptiles/birds
lizardfolk musician who started having internal conversations with her bass (who personified her more violent band persona) in order to find advice. turns out that bass was haunted by moon spirits or something. she started a moon club at a local library to find out more.
same character tried to convince a devil that the material plane was a cool place to live by explaining local cheeses to her (that devil already knew what cheese was).
kobold painter-warrior who got so angry that a noble had a golden toilet that she started screaming from the top of her lungs and tore it to shreads.
elderly aarakocra healer who was banned from playing truth-or-dare in their childhood because of the chaos they caused. the party still agreed to play it with them and someone was forced to eat a lemon. they were dared to eat a lemon themself, and turns out being a bird makes that a lot easier.
I have a long streak of nearly exclusively playing reptiles/birds
it/its | xie/xer | pfp by crowtaur
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acetylcholine
- Posts: 79
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these stories are all fantastic to read haha. i definitely feel the "always playing a dragonborn/lizard/etc" thing lol. here's the story i promised! sorry cause it is somewhat lengthy, hope you enjoy!
one of my favorites from the campaign ive been playing in involves my dragonborn wild magic sorcerer and our party's firbolg barbarian/druid fighting an annis hag. we had been lured into an inn in the feywild (our fault, yes) and got jumped by a hag coven. the barbarian was stuck on the ground with a magic cuff, and i was the only other one in the room apart from the hag (the other party members were dealing with other hags elsewhere). being the comparatively squishy caster i am, i opted to thunder step far away so the hag couldn't use any melee attacks against me, at least for a little bit.
so we're sitting here shitting ourselves, since our tank is restrained and i am a much more fragile target who can't run forever. i decide that, fuck it, if i'm gonna go down i'm gonna make it as painful for the hag as possible. i opt to cast storm sphere. it isn't objectively the strongest spell or whatever, but my character is thunder and lightning themed and it gives me bonus attacks on my turns so whatever.
there's a problem. this casting of a leveled spell causes a wild magic surge. we're just using the table in the player's handbook, for reference. i roll the d100 and... it's a 7. what does that correlate to on the table?
"You cast fireball as a 3rd-level spell centered on yourself."
FUCK. now, i'm not especially worried about the damage. i have enough hit points that i can take one fireball, even with a failed save (assuming it rolls around average damage). what i'm worried about is dropping concentration on storm sphere, since that would mean i just burned a fourth level slot for zero reason. i succeed the dex save, so the DC for my concentration check is just a flat 10. roll that save and... success!!
so this hag witnesses a dragonborn summon a storm cloud and immediately explode. but i'm not done yet. i still get a bonus action. i can cast a lightning bolt at her, and since she's inside the area of effect, i get advantage. the very first attack roll is a critical hit! 8d6 lightning damage against the hag.
the barbarian realizes the magic cuff doesn't prevent her from wildshaping (druid multiclass), so she turns into a snake to escape, and suddenly the hag is not just screwed. she's fucked. the two of us together kill her within another round thanks to my blasting spells and the barbarian's wildshape attacks.
TL;DR got stuck in what seemed to be a terrible scenario, cast fireball on myself, still managed to survive.
one of my favorites from the campaign ive been playing in involves my dragonborn wild magic sorcerer and our party's firbolg barbarian/druid fighting an annis hag. we had been lured into an inn in the feywild (our fault, yes) and got jumped by a hag coven. the barbarian was stuck on the ground with a magic cuff, and i was the only other one in the room apart from the hag (the other party members were dealing with other hags elsewhere). being the comparatively squishy caster i am, i opted to thunder step far away so the hag couldn't use any melee attacks against me, at least for a little bit.
so we're sitting here shitting ourselves, since our tank is restrained and i am a much more fragile target who can't run forever. i decide that, fuck it, if i'm gonna go down i'm gonna make it as painful for the hag as possible. i opt to cast storm sphere. it isn't objectively the strongest spell or whatever, but my character is thunder and lightning themed and it gives me bonus attacks on my turns so whatever.
there's a problem. this casting of a leveled spell causes a wild magic surge. we're just using the table in the player's handbook, for reference. i roll the d100 and... it's a 7. what does that correlate to on the table?
"You cast fireball as a 3rd-level spell centered on yourself."
FUCK. now, i'm not especially worried about the damage. i have enough hit points that i can take one fireball, even with a failed save (assuming it rolls around average damage). what i'm worried about is dropping concentration on storm sphere, since that would mean i just burned a fourth level slot for zero reason. i succeed the dex save, so the DC for my concentration check is just a flat 10. roll that save and... success!!
so this hag witnesses a dragonborn summon a storm cloud and immediately explode. but i'm not done yet. i still get a bonus action. i can cast a lightning bolt at her, and since she's inside the area of effect, i get advantage. the very first attack roll is a critical hit! 8d6 lightning damage against the hag.
the barbarian realizes the magic cuff doesn't prevent her from wildshaping (druid multiclass), so she turns into a snake to escape, and suddenly the hag is not just screwed. she's fucked. the two of us together kill her within another round thanks to my blasting spells and the barbarian's wildshape attacks.
TL;DR got stuck in what seemed to be a terrible scenario, cast fireball on myself, still managed to survive.
she/they/he. professional dork. dragon on the weekends (and during the week too). ask me about d&d or music.
dragon cave stuff:
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SapphireRaeburn
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These are all awesome stories!! XD
I've only got one, I need to play more. Ha ha.
As a GM:
I had planned this awesome Inn with a big stairwell and puzzles and stuff for a one-shot, trying to lead the players upstairs. They said: Hm. Nope. We gonna ignore all the people in here, talk to the cat, break through the window, and find a rope leading upstairs. They surprised my evil wizard and after a struggle complete with flying dressers and stealing underwear, ended up with tossing my wizard out the window in order to break the curse on the Inn.
I've only got one, I need to play more. Ha ha.
As a GM:
I had planned this awesome Inn with a big stairwell and puzzles and stuff for a one-shot, trying to lead the players upstairs. They said: Hm. Nope. We gonna ignore all the people in here, talk to the cat, break through the window, and find a rope leading upstairs. They surprised my evil wizard and after a struggle complete with flying dressers and stealing underwear, ended up with tossing my wizard out the window in order to break the curse on the Inn.
~Sapphire or SapphireRae. She/Her. Dorky noodle dragon who arts sometimes and writes more often. h0i!
Some of my fav Dragon Cave babies:
Some of my fav Dragon Cave babies:
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Ehmaree
- Posts: 119
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From today:
We ran into a group of fire elementals at the inn, and one of the players managed to talk to them “consume all!” “No, don’t consume all. Consume some.” “Consume some.” In short, we managed to calm them down.
We also then proceeded to shove them into an oven at the inn in order to give them free fire for the oven.
We ran into a group of fire elementals at the inn, and one of the players managed to talk to them “consume all!” “No, don’t consume all. Consume some.” “Consume some.” In short, we managed to calm them down.
We also then proceeded to shove them into an oven at the inn in order to give them free fire for the oven.